|
Post by Admin on Oct 31, 2013 3:02:42 GMT
Slap the dog and spit in the fire! It's the Fifth Annual Southern Supper!
This auction item is for those of you unafraid to go big—and by “big” we mean “big with dairy, sugar, salt, hog, greens, grease, corn in its solid and liquid forms, and George Jones memorial tribute toasts.” Win this item, younguns, and experience what the expression "full as a tick" truly means.
What you (and three of your lucky guests) get: a butter-soaked, deep-fried, four-skillet minimum extravaganza that includes three or four appetizers (or "knick-knacks," as they are called by some Tennessee grannies), two meats, four veggies (yes, mac and cheese is a vegetable), biscuits, cornbread, at least three desserts, various southern beverages, and a big ol’ passel o' party favors to take home to mamaw and papaw.
You might also get: an extended explanation of the superiority of vinegar-based versus molasses-based barbecue sauces; a biscuit-making demo; a clogging demo; a mini-lecture on proper southern pronunciation (quit sayin' "fire" when the Lord knows it's "far"); the chance to wear Nana Range's bonnet or Marissa's Derby Princess crown (or both at once); and/or the chance to distinguish yourself, and win a southern prize (like a gigantic bottle of Karo syrup or a Porter Wagoner record), in the watermelon-seed spitting contest, the boiled-peanut eating contest, and/or the long-distance grits toss.
Donated by Melissa Range and Marissa Fugate
Starting Bid $15
|
|
|
Post by lordewhocares on Nov 11, 2013 16:05:39 GMT
$30
|
|
|
Post by cbolinger on Nov 12, 2013 16:50:33 GMT
$50
|
|
|
Post by mrfuga0 on Nov 13, 2013 10:28:29 GMT
I'd like to remind folks that, while Missouri certainly makes an effort to be considered southern, it most assuredly is not. And this supper is your closest chance to indulge in authentic chocolate gravy and biscuits, hog jowls, and a whole mess o'fried dainties. Don't waste your time and gas driving all over creation.
|
|
|
Post by biorcwen on Nov 13, 2013 13:35:15 GMT
Also, I can vouch for the fact that Fugate will fry anything that's not nailed down. Once she fried an end table of mine. Deeee-licious!
|
|
|
Post by annemyers on Nov 13, 2013 19:44:25 GMT
$100
|
|
|
Post by cbolinger on Nov 14, 2013 16:44:09 GMT
$125
|
|
|
Post by mrfuga0 on Nov 14, 2013 19:02:25 GMT
Whew! This bidding is heatin' up faster than a knife fight in a phone booth!
|
|
|
Post by biorcwen on Nov 14, 2013 22:10:02 GMT
Fugate, you dadblamed city girl! In East TN, we don't use phones; we just holler 'cross the ridge. (I will be teaching winners of the Southern Supper all kinds of other southern untruths like this one! Git ready, children!)
|
|
|
Post by mrfuga0 on Nov 15, 2013 9:08:24 GMT
How about a knife fight in a deer hide?
|
|
|
Post by annemyers on Nov 15, 2013 21:24:08 GMT
$150
|
|
|
Post by cbolinger on Nov 16, 2013 0:51:00 GMT
$175
|
|